doubt in one’s self has become second nature to some people and in this society it is easy to become doubtful of anything. we live in a world where people put each other down so much we begin to believe all the words that are thrown at us. i am not sure if you would consider this abuse but i can remember a time when i have felt very doubtful about everything, as though nothing was possible.
on the outside, some of us may look fine, on the inside, some of us are screaming just hoping to be able to shout the reality that lies on the surface. feeling frustrated because we cannot say what we want in the moment that we would like.
i have many days when i ask myself what the fuck i am doing and why, what is my purpose, how can i accomplish certain tasks that are expected of me and most of all, what people really think of me. yes, i also know that maybe that should not matter but i am 53 and still feel the need for this validation. the truth is i have many doubts about myself, especially the one’s you can’t see and i won’t share only because the people who read this might have the balls to express this to important resources.
therefore, with doubt comes an inability to be happy when all should be good you feel as though something is missing.i am having my own epic reality this morning about self devotion and love and i really need to get my shit together. what the hell is it that is bothering me so much that all i do is cover it up and just pretend as thought nothing is wrong?
that my friends is the ultimate question of the day – don’t be fooled by the ‘facade’, it is a mere reflection of life’s teachings and knowledge. the truth lies within and most of you will never see it.