where are we supposed to be
are we where we are now for a reason
I often ask these questions when I am out of balance and yet asking to many questions leads to more questions. they say we are not defined by what we do but how we represent ourselves and I do not believe that. I think that life shows us things which we would not see if we did not take the time to see them.
there is no bigger picture, there is no rainbow at the end of the day, there is only right now, in this moment and whether you believe your journey or not, it is all for some reason.
I have very few people who believe in what I do, coming here everyday and writing my thoughts and it isn’t about proving something to them but only a means to see how far I can take my journey. experiences have shown me great things, I have learned from many heart aches, suffering, loss, and most of all defeat in myself. in the beginning of 2019, I set out to forgive myself for past wrongs, things that I realized to late were on a path of destruction and the fun things is as long as I realized this, I was able to fix it.
well, some of it.
does it take away the experience of what had happened? no. certainly not. we cannot change the journey but only embrace it with all that we are and all that we know. in the real world, I live a normal boring life, something that is not what I had invisioned for myself. I don’t believe that this is where I should be and although I have tried many avenues, failure has been a part of my life for many years.
the question today is maybe whether or not my journey is really teaching me something or trying to open my eyes to something else. when and if I find those answers, you will be the first to know.