the guilt of never knowing ones purpose

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a word…

when we decide life is at a standstill, it is because our meaning has. no purpose. it has to be said, i am such this person. i have been filtering my thoughts, trying to feel things, new adventures and i now know it is something bigger than i that haunts me.

the answer has not surfaced and maybe my frustrations are a mere reflection of what i thought my meaning is or has to be. i truly believed for the longest time this was it, life is what it is and we need to accept it.

however, my thoughts are felt less cooperative today that maybe just maybe there is more and the ambition of life needs to go fuck itself.

i don’t want to just be, i want to be great, i want to marvel at something, i want to wake up every morning and feel important not on the outside but on the inside.


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