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i have come to realize that no matter how hard you work at something, how great you think something is, there is always people trying to destroy it. people say or do things that make you feel two inches tall, like nothing is ever good enough or they find criticism in everything

growing up, things were like that and as an adult, i find it very hard to keep my spirits up because of people. i wonder why my efforts are always shot to the ground as if the work i do just doesn’t satisfy the needs of others.

i guess most people have an agenda of their own and we have to accept that.

i finally put my big project on paper and i must say i was pretty proud of it until yesterday. i gave it to someone to read and they found fault in it as if their agenda wasn’t fulfilled therefore it was pointed at me. i am exhausted by all this because i do not feel a reward behind my efforts and i totally believe success should follow hard work.

maybe i am wrong but we teach our children that if they do good, they get rewarded. so what happens when they are adults and things seem so different, the world is a mean place and people do not congratulate you as much as you would like too.

so you have had nothing but negativity all your life, then how do you cope with that?

if i really ever find the answer i’ll let you know. in the meantime, i am still counting the days until my next vacation. (ha ha)