this week i struggle with being nice, nice to people, nice to whom ever comes to mind and especially nice to myself. i think about the trip i just took and also realize that no matter well i can treat myself, something negative always comes out of it.
i used to be a big push over, doing everything and anything for people just because i felt it was expected of me. lately, it is pretty much the opposite so much that i have become so bitchy with all of the world that i don’t give two shits about anyone.
my work is my survival; it’s all about the money! hours put in means survival for the next week and the week after that. i no longer feel the need to be surrounded by superficial people because we all know those kinds of people have but one purpose in life:
they pretend to like you, want to help you and in the end you know they are either talking behind your back or want something from you. they try to change your ways of thinking and being and i have no respect or tolerance for this kind of behaviour. it took me a long time to realize and see this or even say it out loud.
i am nice to the ones i need to be nice too and those others i can just walk around them as though they were an imaginary skeleton. now, the future is all about now, what i am doing today, maybe tomorrow and think so be it.